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Thursday, September 29, 2011

Thursday Spotlight: Laura Kaye

Men’s Top Sexual Fantasies

So, all week I’ve been chatting about women’s sexual fantasies. Makes sense, since I’m celebrating the release of my debut erotic romance (TOMORROW!) called Just Gotta Say, which features a woman getting to act out her most secret, forbidden fantasy. Well, fair’s fair, I say, so today we’re turning the tables and getting into men’s most private thoughts. There’s overlap to be sure, but men’s sexual fantasies also differ from women’s in some interesting ways. So, based on an analysis of multiple survey results on male sexual fantasies, here’s what gets men all revved up:

Male-male. Among many heterosexual men, the idea of any sexual or sensual activity is illicit, and that makes it dark, dangerous, and arousing, though it doesn’t mean they’re gay or even bi-.

Domination. Men fantasize about being totally let out of the box, completely free to exercise their every male desire. They want to be rough and aggressive and take what they want to gain their pleasure. They want to be in control, and they’re eager to unleash their inner caveman to do it.

Bondage. Connected to men’s domination fantasies, they get off on the idea of tying a woman up. For real. Not just easily removed silk scarves that offer the illusion of bondage, but men get off on the idea of physically restraining women using handcuffs, rope, or other bondage devices.

Anal Sex. You knew this had to be on here somewhere, didn’t you? Talk about illicit, and dirty, and maybe even a bit degrading. Men fantasize about penetrating a woman’s body, everywhere. And that makes anal sex a top sexual fantasy for most men.

Masturbation. Men want to jerk off in front of you, and they want you to jerk them off. Pretty much, they dream of any and all handjob action—add a little in-public danger to ramp up the arousal even further.

Voyeurism and Exhibitionism. Men are visually stimulated, so the idea of watching and being watched turns them on. The thought of other men watching you pleasure him, but not getting to touch you in return, is a big ego-builder. They also like women’s exhibitionism, and are all too happy to watch you masturbate or strip for them. They’re all about the eye candy.

Group Sex. Of a very particular kind, and I know you know what I’m talking about. A top male fantasy is having sex with two women. The thought of being able to please two women in bed speaks to the core of the male sexual ego, making it one of the most commonly held male sexual fantasies.

Oral Sex. This is one men can’t stop thinking about. And, like handjobs, is especially nice because it can be performed in lots of risky places. While driving? While sitting at a desk? In a dark alley? On a dancefloor? Is it getting hot in here? And, I’m sure you won’t be surprised that oral sex including deep throat is an especial turn-on for men.

So, did I miss a male sexual fantasy your guy particularly enjoys? Stop back by tomorrow for the conclusion of my Whipped Cream Spotlight!

Thanks for reading,
Laura Kaye



ABOUT THE AUTHOR: A multi-published author of paranormal, contemporary and erotic romance, Laura Kaye’s hot, heartfelt stories are all about the universal desire for a place to belong. Laura is the author of the bestselling contemporary romance Hearts in Darkness and the bestselling and award-nominated paranormal romance Forever Freed. Just Gotta Say is Laura’s third published book, and her fourth, North of Need (Book 1 in the Hearts of the Anemoi Series) releases on November 1. Laura lives in Maryland with her husband, two daughters, and cute-but-bad dog, and appreciates her view of the Chesapeake Bay every day.


Leave a comment on today's post for a chance to win one of three E-book copies of Just Gotta Say (releases 9/30 from Decadent Publishing. Winners will be chosen by WC on Saturday. The Just Gotta Blog Tour features giveaways at every stop.


Anonymous said...

You are killin me Laura!! My Man LOVES to dream....doesn't mean all his fantasies come true!

Exactly how much research did you do on this subject?


heather said...

Yep, that sounds about right. Although I've noticed guys like a menage with two guys and girl even though they won't do anything with each other. I'm not sure why, something about two guy friends being able to tag team a girl, then maybe they give each other a high-five afterwards (roll my eyes). I didn't know about the bondage, very interesting.

kerribookwriter said...


Had to come out and support you on your tour--I know how tough these tours are and I wanted to try to catch up with you along the route.

This book sounds faboo, my friend. We hosted a class kind of like this over at Celtic Hearts earlier this year entitled Mind Your MANnerisms and taught by a man. Very interesting.

Can't wait to check it out!

Best of luck with it,

_yay_ said...

How about the setting?
I'm sure the guys have some preferences. On the kitchen table? In the alley behind the club / up against a wall?
Oh the possibilities...
Not entering the giveaway :-) However, I AM recommending Just Gotta Say to all of you. *waggleseyebrows*

Liz said...

nice work laura.
I like to think I AM a man's fantasy: writer of erotic fiction, brewery owner, not hard to look at...

Anna said...


Laura Kaye said...

Sorry I'm late to the party today, guys, had to go back to work after several days off for illness and my work filters blocked the site!!! Catching up now!

Laura Kaye said...

@Tracy--I'm not telling...but, just know, oh, the sacrifices I make for you! :D

@heather--Yeah, I agree with that one. I know, right? The bondage one was really interesting to me too, none of that fake bondage, now!

@Keri--thanks for coming out and supporting me! Definitely appreciate that!

@_yay_--risque settings are definitely appealing, I think to both sexes, but I agree with your point! And thanks again for the great review!

@Liz--you rock hard, no doubt! Love that!

@Anne--thanks for the comment!

Anne R said...

Love getting a man's perspective on this subject. Maybe I should ask my man about this tonight...**wink wink
Thanks Laura!

areeths at new dot rr dot com

Laura Kaye said...

Ooh, good idea, Anne! And report back!!! :)

Ipro55 said...

Ok, I had to comment to this one. This list was not a surprise. Except for the Male/Male fantasy. I had to ask a few male friends of mine (who all claim to be straight!) and I was very surprised to find out that 4 out of 5 actually admited to at some point in their lives having had the M/M fantasy. Although they swear it does not in any way shape or form mean they are gay. lol Well shoot... color me surprised! You learn new things every day. lol

And I must say... my deepest sympathies, Laura, for all the painful and boring research work you had to do for this article. ;-)

Laura Kaye said...

Ooh, lpro55--thanks for the field research!!! :) And, yes, the things I do in the name of good fiction! ;)

Luv2laugh82 said...

Just downloaded Just gotta say....have to run and start reading it NOW!! His fantasy will have to wait!! LOL!!

Jeanne S.
Luv2laugh82 at verizon dot net

Laura Kaye said...

Oh, Jeanne! Yay! Thanks much! Happy reading!

Erin said...

Laura -
Yet again another great post. Anxiously waiting to download the new book. I have my whole weekend planned out and it involves me, my nook and your book! Have a wonderful tour!

Anonymous said...

whew! GREAT blog! Rina

June M. said...

You are just too good to everyone, working so hard and researching this. Thank you so much for your dedication. Btw, do you need an assistant for this research? LOL
June M.
manning_j2004 at yahoo dot com