Life would be so much easier without hair.
I’d look hideous, but if nobody had hair, we’d all be the same, right? My hair is a constant battle. It is thick and wavy – verging on curly. But I like it straight. I spend a fortune on every anti-frizz product there is, trying to find the miracle one that will make my hair sleek and silky. I have an outrageously expensive flat iron (it IS a miracle!!) that I use daily. I can make it look okay curly, but only if I don’t touch it while it dries and then layer on anti-frizz products. Otherwise I look much like Bozo the clown. Or I glued straw onto my head.
I spend lots of money on color and cuts, too, I‘m ashamed to admit. I don’t go for manicures, and rarely for professional pedicures. I do those at home. But my hair has to be right. My hairdresser knows my hair and how I like it – except for the one time I made the mistake of asking her to do something different. Instead of my usual strawberry blonde, I told her I wanted some lowlights in a caramel color – just a little darker. She used chocolate brown!! Oh my gosh, I looked like a skunk. Then I did the worst thing you can do – I went to the drugstore and bought a highlighting kit and tried to fix it at home. It didn’t look too bad except for the sideways stripes where I’d inexpertly applied the bleach. I finally went back to the hairdresser and confessed. She was horrified at what I’d done and managed to fix me up, but it was so traumatic.
So I dream of shaving my head bald, imagining how much time and money I’d save.